Piquancy
by Makushiin
Summary: just a simple fluffy story from my old archives. a very, very dramatic pureblood.. complaining about dinner. and gets really, really dramatic over it.. WHAT? he's jealous over something fishy. the rating may go up higher in the second part.


Title: Piquancy

Genre: Romance/Humor

**WARNING:** Major OOCness of characters, and an overly dramatic yet cuddly cutie pureblood. :3

**A/N:** IM BACK FROM THE DEAD.

First and foremost, I'm sorry to say I won't be able to update my other VK stories. Yeah those were crappy fanfics written by a crappy teenager. :D

my reason? I already forgot the plots of those. LOL

Secondly, uhh.. The stories I'm going to be posting other than this one is 'pre-written'.

Meaning? These stories are already written and some are mostly complete. So my only task now is to type and upload it. =_= but still, expect some crappy plots and grammar. XP

I haven't written new stories yet because I'm now busy balancing my time with school and work.

But IF EVER I have some extra time, I promise to write new ones. *crosses fingers*

SO AJA!

Reviews are desperately wanted w

Flames are only welcome in winter.

First part:

Kaname's POV

NO! This is not happening again! No! No! Zero is-! ZERO IS-!

**ZERO IS COOKING VEGETABLE AND FISH! **

I, Kuran kaname, will not be able to survive this torture of my beloved handsome lover, Zero Kiryuu, who is now on the meantime cleaning the fish. BLAA~~.

I don't get it, why is zero so persistent on eating this so-called 'healthy foods'?

Can't he see I'm dying here? IM DYING ZERO! IM DYING!

No more veggies.. no.. NOOOOOOO!

O_O

It seems zero could hear my rant because he suddenly looked at me. I only stared back at him innocently.

"Aren't you going to help me here?" he asked.

I would LOVE to! But.. but..

"I can't stand the smell of fish.." I replied while hiding behind the couch. I AM MOST DEFINITELY NOT going near that pungent smell! Even if it kills me! NOOO!

I only saw zero rolling his eyes. Then faced me his back. *insert kaname 's sad face*

"Then how about cutting the eggplants?" oh cutting you say? I love cutting. Sure! Sure!

"Okay!" I replied while cheerfully jumping out from my hiding place. "Where's the scissors?"

Zero was at that time starting to heat up some oil. Finally fish! Bwahaha! You'll be gone for good!

Zero looked at me again while crossing his arms. "I meant for you to cut it into bite sized pieces. Using a _knife_."

" Ooohh.. a knife."

Zero only rolled his eyes again. "Its already prepared on the table kaname. You do know how to cut things now, do you?" zero asked as he begins to fry the fish.

VICTORY! I only nodded and plopped down on the chair. I grabbed for the nearest eggplant and placed it on the chopping bored in front of me. "Nee, zero.. If eggplants were brown.."

"Hmm?" I could hear the sizzle-sizzle of the fish which zero was happily cooking.

"Don't you think.. ah.. ah.. Eggplants would look like a p-?" I was abruptly when I saw Zero glaring at me. I could feel the intensity of his glare. Ohh scary..

"Like a what?"

"You know.. Like a pe-" I suddenly felt a loud thud on my head. I got an ouwiee . nyuu :'(

I looked up at zero. He was slightly.. blushing? Why did he have to hit me anyway?! Hmmp!

"You are not saying that P-word in the kitchen Kaname! Especially when we are cooking our food!' he scolded while looking at me.

Aww.. :'( kana-chan meant no harm. "but.. but.. I was only wondering if.."

Zero only sighed. "Just get to work okay? Get it over with while I cook the fish. I can't do two things at the same time you know."

I reluctantly took another one then cut it in half. Ohh! It's the influence of the fish I tell you! =_=

That.. That fish is taking my zero away from me! I stared angrily at zero's direction. Imma! Get my hands on that fish and kill it over and over again! It's taking my zero! MY ZERO!

"Kaname! Stop staring at my back or you'll bore holes on it."

It's the fish I tell you! Its giving my zero-rin a bad influence! Chop, chop, chop, goes the eggplant because of my anger.

I don't care if it looks like a violet penis! THERE I'VE SAID IT!

*loud chop*

it looks like a PENIS okay?! A PENIS!

I continued chopping the pe—err eggplant I also accidentally chopped the chopping board.

I'm jealous! SUPER JEALOUS!

Zero is giving all his attention to the fish! Th-that fish.. look, zero is smiling happily while he's frying it. Why that fi-! Zero only smiles at me! ONLY AT KANA-CHAN! I continued chopping through my vampiric strength.

I am mad! Mad! Mad! I didn't notice that I pulverized the chopping board until Zero yelled at me to stop.

UH-OH..

I stopped midway while looking at him. Zero was furious and I don't know why.

I slowly looked at the table. "Oh."

The eggplant was powdered, the chopping board was turned to small pieces and oh, I made marks on the table..

Zero would kill me..

I slowly looked at him.. oh no.

He was turning red.

"ON THE COUCH NOW!" he yelled.

No need for him to repeat that! Well, it was because of that fish he was cooking! Oh! Oh! I hope that fish will burn!

"Don't come near here until I tell you so." Zero said while cleaning the mess I made. But the fish started it! It was seducing my POOR ZERO! MY ZERO! Noo!

I only pouted while looking at his direction. I.. I cant accept it!

I, Kuran Kaname, a pureblood king, ruler of all vampires, the most beautiful creature ever LIVED ON earth has lost my charming appeal to a thing! A THING!

I bitch-slapped myself mentally for a few times. No negative thoughts! No negative thoughts Kana-chan!

_Relax.._

_Think about beautiful things.._

_flowers.. roses.. bed.. zero.. eggplants.. fish.. oh no fish.. fish is bad.. very bad.. okay.. positive thoughts.. hmm, remember yoga.._

_Inhale.. exhale.. inhale.. exhale.._

_Think about beautiful things.. _

_silver.. bloody rose.. zero.. yes.. yes zero is always beautiful.. lube.. cock rings.. feathers.. eggplants.. did I mention eggplants again? Hmm.. zero's eggplant yummy.._

I slightly stared at zero whom already started cooking some veggies.

Maybe the fish was done? BWAHAHA victory!

I only sighed while looking at zero. I am soo hungry. Even my stomach agrees. It keeps making those grumble-grumble noise. Even if I am an amazingly hot and sexy pureblood vampire, I do eat mind you.

Oh yes. I love eating. Especially zero.

Oh! I love eating zero! Zero for breakfast, zero for lunch, zero for snack, zero for dinner, zero for midnight snack, ANYTIME! I'll never get tired of eating zero. Oh yes. Zero is only for me.

So that's why, no other living thing can have him! Even possessive fangirls! You hear that ladies?!

ZERO IS ONLY FOR KANAME! Glue that to your butt and remember it well! Or else you'll die young while I pulverize your bone from the inside! You got that?!

ZERO IS MINE! MINE! MINE! MINE! MINE! Even if I have to leave a hickey on his ass to mark him. Oh I will! Just so you people will understand who owns zero, and that is ME! KANAME KURAN! You fangirls got the memo?!

*end part 1*

**A/n**: I hope you like this stupid story. .

Also, I have this fic I'm working on (still KaZe) but it will have a more serious and heavy atmosphere than this one. ^_^

The title is _**Zeana**_.. (Zero+Kaname) but I haven't finished written the half of chapter 1. So if ever I will be able to finish it and post it, will you read it? Nee? :3

Thanks a bunch for stopping by!

Part 2 will be posted after a few days or so X3

Ciao`

Peace and love,

Maku.


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